Weekly editor’s outburst before Royal Wedding
Speaking at a hastily convened press conference outside A1 pets on Constitution Street Shavers Weekly editor and all round nice guy Mr Frank Simpson (59) has confused journalists from The Evening News, Scotsman, The Skinny and even his own publication we can exclusively reveal!
Firstly he seemed to congratulate the royal couple Kate (Middsie) and Wills (baldy) but later in his convoluted statement seemed to think the marriage was domed “I give it six weeks.” he commented towards the end of his four hour speech in which he had been taking frequent gulps from several bottles of Duvel Belgian lager (8.5%). He later cleaned up the situation explaining that he wasn’t referring to the royal duet but in fact the course of treatment he is undergoing for a sexually transmitted disease. “I’ve got a right dose of the gonny, pal.” he later explained intelligently.