HEARTWARMING NEW TWIST IN TRAMS DEBAUCLE

HEARTWARMING NEW TWIST IN TRAMS DEBAUCLE

In an exciting new twist, little liked periodical Shavers Weekly is to take over the building and completion of the Edinburgh tram system.

“I saw the struggle and the infighting over this project and decided that as a gift to the city The Shavers Weekly would take over what has been a blight on the city’s architectural and business landscape for several years- I know of several businesses that have suffered a direct consequence of the extensive time of this project – Embo delicatessen on Leith walk was such a place and one time they couldn’t even afford to advertise in the Shavers Weekly and that’s bad for business very bad. Once I’d put their windows in a couple of times attitudes changed – but it was still very bad for business”

CHANGES

Scottish Man holding bottle of poppers
Alex Salmond: Does he really need to lose weight.

 

There will be a certain amount of controversy surrounding my new directions but I’ve checked thouroughly in a straw pole of revellers at Pricilla’s (Prissys) of Leith walk and what became obvious that most townspeople in Edinburgh actually want is a compact Michael Caine Great to be britishroute where they can compare prices of room odourisors – that’s poppers to you and me. Politically I am fortunate enough to have George Salmon’s full backing on this matter after meeting him in the toilets at CCBlooms a couple of weeks ago.”

SPONSORS

Simpson (59) has already enlisted a full range of sponsors from the business world and is thought to include Liquid Gold, Hardcore Extreme, Reds, Dulcoease Stool Softener and of course – Indigo Yard.

http://www.edinburghtrams.com/

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